Un|vErSaL cOnTrOvErSy...

ok aiman...here goes...

ok...i've not been blogging for days..(je ok!)...been really busy not meman*** ok aiman my dear, but more like WORKING...thank u...
I've been sick really frequently too nowadays..no specific reason to why that occured but i guess it's the dry season and stress...Ok now this is something that i've been thinking about a lot these past few days...

People always come up to me and say...

Always abide ur instincts coz they're like the other U that went through the day just slightly faster so there's a tendency that things will turn out just the way it's supposed to be...
And think with ur brains, not ur heart...For our emotions are games of the satan...

But when these two thoughts collide, i feel that it's just about the same...
I mean, instincts come from the heart...and yet people told u not to listen to what ur heart tells u coz it might just cause catastrophe...Oh man...

Well...i had some really rough times myself few days back..
Not only pertaining me, but also pertaining my own fresh n blood AND the people i care about very much...
I realized that there's so much anger and rage in all of us...that's why nothing works well just enough...there's always these missing, neglected pieces of the bad puzzle laying somewhere..
Of course, we're just plain humans..born to make mistakes...and we often forget...not that we chose to forget, but more of the side effects of our lifestyle...I admit, i've not been a dedicated solehah muslim...and i realized...THAT'S where it all started from...the lack of devotion towards Allah S.W.T....

Hati selalu resah...
Minda selalu berceramuk...
Kening sering berkerut....
Jiwa dan raga hampir terpisah...

That's how bad i felt...Now i'm not entirely ok...
We all know that God will never help us, if we didn't help ourselves...
And that things happen coz we chose it to happen...
Sedar tak sedar sebenarnya the things that happen and revolve around us are the things that we have chosen...we have to learn to except the facts, the package...coz nothing is perfect...
There's yin and yang...Now THAT'S what makes it PERFECT...
The cure for my insecurity, low self-steem, and all these negative vibes in me is in front of my eyes...Kain sejadah yang senantiase berbau harum walau diletak di mana jua...
But we often neglect this...kerana ikutkan sangat hati...nak mengejar dunia...nak mengejar kebahagiaan alam yang sementara...walhal kita boleh kecapi semua itu for infinite time di alam syurga...

Not that we all are not aware of this..but that's the saddest part of being a human being...we are aware and yet we chose to divert our priorities to something else which brings happiness for years, when there's happiness that awaits us for the infinite of time...only some of us are being the true khalifah...but the majority are acting as if the other side is just an illusion...

And the pathetic phrase arises...LIFE STARTS AT 40...What if u were to be dead by 39? Now when does YOUR life starts? or more like WHERE does your life starts?...I chose to settle down now, at the age of 21...to have my own family...i've never felt how good it is to be in a FAMILY... not that i don't have one...but i have one that's more like a unity...not a family...think of the difference in that...

UNITY vs FAMILY...and all i wanted was a happy family...a family of my own...